My brother's theory
by this iz my username
Summary: This is my brother's theory on something about Star Wars that has been troubling me for a long time.
1. Chapter 1

**This is my brother's theory on why they never talk about going to the bathroom in Star Wars.**

A long time ago, in the same galaxy that Star Wars takes place in a Jedi was on a mission to stop a smuggler. He was just about to catch the criminal when nature called. The food he had eaten a few hours before had reached the other end. Thankfully he was able to make it to the toilet before he pooped his pants. That break had led to him being captured. Ever since then Jedi only poop once a year. It takes all their power to store it for one big moment, where they clog their toilet. And _that_ is my brother's theory on Jedi and toilets.

P.S. My brother is older than you think... a lot older


	2. Chapter 2

**Since my brother is being to difficult to talk to and I wanted to post something else on this, these are every mistake my brother has ever made about star wars.**

****_1. He calls Ahsoka's head-tails ponytails._

_2. He thought jedi had to be on the council to train a padawan _ **(This was a 10-minute argument)**

_3. He thinks the AT-TE look like giant walking poops_

_4. He thinks that you can clone a Jedi to get a force-sensitive clone every time._

_5. He thought that Ahsoka's padawan braid was a necklace_

_6. He thinks Yoda is secretly a girl_


	3. Chapter 3

**A new chapter! This chapter's question to my brother is How Do You Think Grevious Goes To The Bathroom.**

**My Brother: **I don't think Grevious even goes to the bathroom. I think he just leaks oil to get rid of all the waste in his body.

**Story that goes with it:** _Grevious's brain requires a certain amount of nutrients to keep it going. No matter how good the nutrient-filled solution is it always leaves waste. Once a week Grevious walks to an old chamber pot and unplugs his bladder. Yucky oil spills out and that is how he goes to the bathroom._


	4. Chapter 4

**Yet another story of my brother's theories! I can't believe how popular it is! It's even more popular than the stories I ****_don't _****only spend five minutes on. :'(**

**Me:** So Mike, what do you think would happen if Anakin used a suicide bomb to kill Dooku and Grevious?

**My brother: **Anakin would die. Dooku would die. Grevious would die. There would be no Darth Vader so Mace Windu would kill the Chancellor. They would all live happily ever after. The end.

**Me: **Dude, that's a boring answer. So, why do you think they never show people farting or burping?

**My Bro: **They can't afford it

**Me: **Noooooooo! you're boring now!

**And that is why there will be no more chapters for a while.**


	5. Chapter 5

**This is just a conversation between me and my brother.**

**me: ***Giggles because I'm reading a funny fanfic*

**Mike: **What are you doing?

**Me: **Reading a funny fanfic. You wouldn't understand because you're not a Star Wars fan.

**Mike: **Yes I am!

**Me: **What color lightsaber blades are there in star wars?

**Mike: ** Red, blue, green, yellow, purple, and orange.

**Me: **Since when is there an orange blade?

**Mike: **Since a jedi ate one too many carrots.

**People, I am ashamed to say my brother is 15, not 8 or somethin' like that.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Here is my brother's reaction just now**

**Mike: **Hey! Is there a story where Anakin kisses Ahsoka and gets kicked out of the Order?

**Me: **Yeah, I think there is a fanfic like that.

**Mike: **Fan_fic_? Oh fic! Hey! That sounds cool! fic, fic, fic! Holy fic!

**Me: **Okay...

**Mike: **Oh fic! I forgot to do my chemestry!


	7. Chapter 7

**Here's my brother's star wars story. I didn't write it.**

Anakin was sitting on the john when Ahsoka burst in and cried, "We have to bring relief supplies to Prunonia!"

"What supplies?"

"Toilet paper!"

"Why does the military enterprise have to bring relief toilet paper to a planet?"

"The Seperatists are blockading the planet from toilet paper deliveries!"

"And... why should I care?"

"Their main export is prunes to the republic!"

"What do we do with the prunes?"

"The clone troopers get constipated really easily."

"Then let's go!"

On their way there they ran into Dooku. Anakin asked, "Why are you here?"

"I happened to be passing it on the way to Prunonia with a blockade of ships when I had to stop there because I had to use the restroom and there are no stalls on any of my ships. I never left because... well... I'm an old man and their main export is prunes."

**This has nothing to do with Star Wars ****_whatsoever _****but it's still classic Mike**

My brother was outside when a kid named Kieran fell off his scooter and scraped his knee. Kieran started bawling and insisted he couldn't walk. My brother looked at the kid's knee and said, "We're going to have to amputate." then went into our garage and got our biggest, rustiest saw he could find. The second Kieran saw it he hopped back on his scooter and rode back home faster than anyone has seen him ride before.


	8. Chapter 8

**This is my brother's masterpiece. He typed it himself.**

Count Dookie farted.

Back on Croissant, Mace Window said, "I sense a disturbance in the Force."

"Agree, I do." Said Jedi Master Yogurt.


	9. Chapter 9

**Hi! This isn't a chapter but it's very important! My brother, the one you have been reading about now has an account. He is Bossness. He even has a story, which doesn't have very many reads so far. Please read it.**


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